Purpose

Drew Alexander came into this world in his own time. He has always done everything on his own schedule. I was 19 when I had him and he was the first in so many things. He was my first child, the first grandchild, first great grandchild, first boy in a long line of girls and most importantly the first boy that stole my heart.

Looking back over the years the pregnancy with Drew was pretty uneventful. My ex-husband, Jeff,  and I had no idea what to expect. We were full of aspirations to be more than our parents were and love would solve everything. The Dr’s had given me the due date of May 3, 1995. From the time we found out we were expecting we prepped and got things ready. We agonized over names, I even went to the trouble to go to the back door and holler are choices of names to see which one flowed. At one appointment we were told we were having a son and couldn’t be happier. I did not know much about boys, I had no boy cousins and only had a sister, so this was going to be an adventure.

On the evening of April 27, 1995 I was crawling into bed and heard a pop. All of a sudden I felt a gush of water come from me. For a moment I had no idea what happened, then it dawned on me my water had just broke! It was baby time, I wake my husband up and tell him that my water had just broke and the show was about to begin. It was like a comedy show seeing him rush around and get ready to go to the hospital. My sister had come out of her room to see what the commotion was and then the real comedy started. He told her it was time to go to the hospital and they both started running around the house trying to get things ready. I changed clothes and mentioned to whoever was around that my bag was next to the door and someone should grab it. Jeff goes to take it to the car and my sister grabs it, they head to car and pull out of the driveway as I am standing in the living room realizing they are leaving without me. In their excitement they forgot me, it didn’t take them long to realize they couldn’t go to the hospital to have a baby if they left the one carrying the baby. Jeff walks back into  the house with his head hanging low realizing his mistake, and I ask my sister to stay home. Watching them run around reminded me of a classic comedy show. I wanted this experience to be just my husband and my baby. Little did we know that we had plenty of time. Drew was just teasing us that it was time.

I felt prepared, I had read dozens of books and we had taken the classes. We decided to stop and get some snacks and drinks for the hospital. We knew it wouldn’t be long before we held our bundle and we need corn nuts to get through it. We get to the hospital and tell them my water broke. I remember the nurse looking up at me and she asked if I was having any contractions. I said no but my water broke so we are here. She gave us the look of a seasoned labor nurse and just told me to start walking till it started hurting and they would get a room ready for me. We must of walked those halls of the hospital for hours before she came back to us and asked me my pain level. I still wasn’t having any contractions, maybe this wasn’t going to be as painful as I thought. Maybe I’m tough and the contractions aren’t bothering me, the nurse just smirked and took us to a room. She put me on one of those belt monitors to check contractions, sure enough they were there but they were tiny and spaced pretty uneven. She told us she was going to tell the Dr to give me some pitocin to speed this up. Sounded like a good idea to me. Little did I know that pitocin was made by the devil and I soon realized that I was not tough and these contractions hurt.

We got to the hospital on the night of April 28, 1995. Drew was not born till the evening of May 1, 1995. Between those dates that is when I had my first dose of mother pain. Any mother knows that the pain starts then and just goes on and on. So to make a long story short 77 hours of labor, 10 of those pushing, Drew Alexander, was brought into this world at 6:45 p.m. on May 1, 1995 by c-section. He was not too happy to be brought out of his warm cocoon and made sure everyone within ear shot knew of his discomfort. He was 7 lbs and 9 oz 19 inches of pure amazingness. That was the moment I truly felt love for the first time. I have heard all the cliches like we all have “they will steal your heart” “when you become a mother you find your purpose”, but it is true. The moment I held my beautiful son for the first time I knew my purpose in this big world. I was meant to be not just a mother but His mother. I made a vow that day that I would do everything in my power to love and protect him. If only I knew love was not enough.

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s